If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
