You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
