Define "chronic" masturbator.
its not stalking. its research.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
