Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
