I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
