Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
