my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
