What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
