You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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