Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize