He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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