Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
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