i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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