My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Randomize
