He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
