Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
