But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
grandma shit on top of the toilet
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
