Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Randomize
