we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
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