So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Randomize
