At least make sure they are 18
Why
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Found your dick twin last night
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize