She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize