I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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