Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize
