i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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