Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(210): View more from Texas

By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE

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(301): View more from Maryland

He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.

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(302): View more from Delaware

I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game

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(903): View more from Texas

Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later

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(203): View more from Connecticut

he thanks me after handjobs.

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

you found the perfect man.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself

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(+61): View more from Australia

You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work

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