What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
