She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
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