Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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