mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Randomize
