Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize