I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
