I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
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