physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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