We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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