So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
