Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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