i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
