I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
