i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
it's great music for shaving your balls
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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