do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize
