Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
