My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
