He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
