New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize