I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
