But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
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