NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
