yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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