she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
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