apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
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